Randi is truly amazingI had struggled with depression from childhood. Twenty-four years ago, in my thirties, I got help and went through conventional therapy which significantly improved my life. But something still did not seem quite right. I found an article Randi had written on-line about the children of narcissists that described a lot of my experience growing up. I was hesitant at first to reach out to Randi, mostly because I felt that I had already gone through therapy and there was nothing else to discuss. I started talking to Randi in January 2021. I also read Randi's amazing book "Close Encounters of the Worst Kind," which explained so much of what I experienced as a child and what I struggled with as an adult. The chapter on empaths explained so much about me and the way I viewed the world and the people around me. A year later I have taken a giant leap forward in my emotional and mental health-I have never been happier. Randi's experience and insights have opened my eyes to the abuse I endured, but more importantly they have allowed me to shed so much pain, anguish and confusion.
Tremendous insight, support and encouragementRandi is so phenomenally well versed and educated within the realms of dealing with different narcissist levels. Speaking with her during this divorce from a narcissist woman has given me a whole new insight as to how these people think and act. Her encouragement and direction is amazing. Every time I speak with her it gives me a good positive outlook on how to handle this divorce from a narcissist. Thank you so much Randi for your insight and encouragement! I couldn't make it through this without you!
Randi Fine has you figured out!I found Randi Fine's website online when I was in a moment of despair 4 years ago. I read her articles and listened to her radio show religiously for a while. A light bulb went off for me that I was married to a narcissist for over 15 years and I couldn't believe it. BUT my life and my marriage finally made sense! Everything Randi writes about and says in her books was exactly my situation and the man I was married to was exactly the person she described. From how he talked to me, how he treated me, his general behavior, and how he treated our kids...the list goes on and on. Also, my symptoms of narcissistic abuse were everything she talks about. I set up counseling sessions with Randi and she helped me through the twists and turns of my divorce. She gave me sound advice on how to handle things, some of which was counterintuitive to what you would do in a "normal" divorce! She cheered me on, validated my thoughts and feelings, and understood what was happening to me. She helped me to stay strong and get through it! I continued to talk with her regularly for a couple of years. Now I set up a call with her when I need a boost, as I feel I am SO much stronger and have come so far. I am very happy with who I am and how I am continuing the healing process! Thank you Randi! 🙂
A lifesaving resource!Randi Fine has been my lifesaver! She has unique personal and professional experience with thousands of clients who have experienced narcissistic abuse in a relationship. Narcissists intentionally manipulate and exploit every opportunity to shame you and skew the way you see yourself because that is the narcissist’s way of maintaining control and blaming the victim in order to continue to project the illusion that they are special and deserving people. These people also act in ways to tarnish you and make you appear defective to others so they can maintain their veneer of being a victim themselves. I tried 2-3 therapists while suffering through a horrific divorce from such a person and found no help because they failed to understand the tricks of a narcissist. It was obvious that your average therapist, not versed in narcissistic tactics, believe that you must be somehow to blame for what happened to you...and that really makes having a productive therapy relationship impossible. Randi UNDERSTANDS!! I ran across Randi’s book – “Encounters of the Worst Kind”- by accident. But when I read it, I said “WOW, this woman gets it”. Then I went to her website and found she offered individual help sessions! From our first session, she gave me insight, support, hope and real help with practical problems such as finding a good lawyer who understood parental alienation. She reached out and contacted other lawyers for me in order to “screen” whether they had the skills to help me through the legal battles with a narcissist. Most importantly, because she has “heard it all” from thousands of people around the world who have gone through your experience, she is able to strongly advise you and validate that you are not to blame. She is an encourager and a lifesaving resource! I owe my life to Randi for helping me through this horrific experience intact! I give her my highest recommendation. Working with those of us that are unfortunate enough to encounter a narcissist is not just a job to Randi, it is her calling and her gift. I recommend her to anyone without reservation.
Randi understands and supportsI've spent countless hours in therapy with people who I felt never understood what I was going through. It was fate that brought me to Randi, who specializes in narcissistic abuse. I finally had a name for what I was dealing with. Talking to Randi made me realize that I'm not crazy and that the only way to break the cycle of abuse is to leave and go no contact. For years, I wondered what was wrong with me. Randi made me see what was wrong was this toxic person in my life -- and that I could be stronger without him in it
Randi is fearless!I came to Randi even after knowing for many years that my mother is a narcissist. It was a time of crisis however and I needed to be able to share my experience with someone who ‘gets it’ so that I would feel safe to talk about it. I was also looking for someone who would call out the narcissistic behaviours/manipulations on my behalf. So, despite all the knowledge I had gained already, here I was still feeling trapped and unable to escape from her. After listening to Randi in a ‘Fine time for Healing’ I discovered so many things I admired about her as a coach/therapist! Randi is fearless. She calls the BS out and she can call it out because she herself has had to do so in her own relationship with her mother. Randi is a life line for so many men and women like myself who are facing the reality of having had a narcissist in their lives. I find myself at a completely different place in my healing than when we first started. I am much more self-differentiated and able to trust my own gut on things. But most importantly, I am also more self-confident and, by extension, more authentically ‘me’. I am writing this testimonial in the hope that it will inspire others to take the plunge and work with Randi. She is an expert on the effects of narcissistic abuse and you couldn’t put your recovery in better hands. Randi works from experience, inner wisdom and the heart.
Empowering and compassionateI initially reached out to Randi for guidance on dealing with my narcissistic mother. I was in deep pain and didn't see a way out of my misery and terrible anxiety. Randi began to counsel me, and immediately things have changed for the better in my life. Randi is very knowledgeable in her area, she is empowering and compassionate. Over time, Randi helped me deal with the narcissistic people in my life, heal from the abuse, and also helped me to become a more secure, healthy-minded person in all areas: marriage, work, friendships. I highly recommend her services to anyone who needs help with any relationships.
Finally validatedBeing seen and validated by Randi was priceless. I am often in spaces where people do not understand what it means to have a mother who doesn't care. Speaking with Randi was so good as she knows what it feels like and that was exactly what I needed.
Exactly what I neededBeing seen and validated by Randi was priceless. I am often in spaces where people do not understand what it means to have a mother who doesn't care. Speaking with Randi was so good as she knows what it feels like and that was exactly what I needed.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart♥After trawling through the web I found you , I’m so glad I have as you are helping me to make sense of everything . My abuse ( I can say that now ) has been ongoing for around 20 yrs + I am going to order your book, and read with anticipation, I love listening to your words of explanation about what is happening and hope that I can help myself further. With reading and listening to your words I know my husband has a narssicistic personality disorder and it isn’t my fault . Thankyou from the bottom of my heart x
Big tough guy brought to tearsLast night I listened to you on an old podcast. You hadn’t published your latest book yet and some female psychiatrist was interviewing you. I almost stopped my truck on the highway when I heard what you said about NPD. I’m a big guy and a tough guy but when you described victims of NPD as being like hosts to a parasite my eyes got wet. I know I am in a marriage with one of these people. It’s effected our children. I’ve been married for 26 years and I’ve been struggling for probably 22. Also, now looking back, my parents were probably narcissistic too. I began working in the oil fields 7 years ago, 1,100 miles from home, to solve my money problems. I think I also did it to get away from the constant sucking away of my life blood.
A guiding lightIts hard to know where to start but I’ll start by saying you have completely changed my life. I came across your podcasts about 2 years ago and when I started to listen to them I was blown away by the fact that it seemed like you were describing my mum and her behaviour, without having ever met her. From the moment I started listening to you my life changed. It was so nice to hear you speak the truth and not sugar coat anything. You tell it how it is and how bad these people really are and that there is no hope of change for them. This was initially a hard pill to swallow but after years and years of narcissistic abuse from my mum I knew deep down that you were right. I had tried everything that was humanly possible to change the unhealthy relationship I had with my mum and then slowly realising blow after blow that this relationship was never going to improve. I first went little contact but of course that didn’t work until i finally went no contact. This was the hardest but one of the best decisions I have ever made. No longer was she constantly in my head and consuming every single part of my life in a negative way. I was finally feeling the freedom of having her out of my life. No drama. No criticism. No second guessing and the list goes on. The amazing thing about your podcast is that when I was feeling low and second guessing myself I had a kind, educated and helpful person to listen to. You will never really know the extent to how you have helped me through the really dark times and I will forever be grateful to you for sharing your story and knowledge with us. I want to thank you again for your ongoing, ground breaking and amazing work bringing narcissistic abuse to the masses through your podcast. It is such a complicated web that we are in when we have to deal with these people and having you as my guide through this journey has been life changing.
Finally released from childhood painGrowing up as a child of NPD abuse is really strange. You hurt every day. You know something is clearly wrong. But, when asked you have almost no ability to articulate why everything is so bad at home. You believe everything you feel is your fault and all of the abuse you are experiencing isn't abuse at all but a simple consequence of some inherent flaw you possess. If you reach out through the traditional channels of therapy as an adult, you will likely become more confused and frustrated. I found they kind of skimmed over my childhood and pushed for me to get functional as fast as possible. I was either mislabeled (usually as ADD), or overly generalized. It seemed that no regular psychologist had any training or expertise in this type of abuse. This is why I believe Randi stands out as one of the best experts in this field. She is a survivor but also the consummate seeker of understanding as a human being. She actually cares about people who have suffered from this abuse. And she learned how to both understand and treat this type of abuse from being in the trenches herself. If you need therapy for this type of abuse, contact Randi for therapy. She has helped me move on from my abusive past and get to a place of peace, warmth, and a fulfilling life
Randi to the rescueAfter an absolute dumpster fire of a relationship with a NPD/APD/Alcoholic/Drug Addict (yes, I hit the grand slam) woman, I sank into some of the worst depression of my life. I saw two psychologists prior to meeting Randi who just didn't seem to understand what was taking place. When I tell you that speaking with Randi for 10 minutes was more valuable than 4 months of therapy with less educated professionals I am not kidding. As a person she is kind, compassionate, a great listener and above all else - KNOWS WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT.
A blessing in my lifeRandi is a blessing in my life. Because of her, I have hope! I can actually see small changes that are making a big difference in my life, and my confidence level has greatly increased. She is showing me that I am not as alone in this world as I think I am; that there are resources readily available in my journey of self-love and acceptance. Because of Randi, I have hope. Words cannot express how much better I feel after speaking with Randi. Her support and words of encouragement are medicine to my soul.
You don't know me but I feel like I know you. Your voice is a regular part of my daily life and your words of wisdom have helped guide me through the worst time in my life. I emailed you a while back when I had just been discarded by my narc sociopath and was losing my will to live. I was, in the blink of an eye, a single mother fleeing for my life and living in a tornado of madness! I lost my home, my dog, my cat, my family, and myself. My narc was divorcing me and trying to financially ruin me among many other things. I am happy to report that my divorce is over and the light has prevailed. The judge saw the injustice and demanded the narc provide me a settlement. I feel like in some way you helped make that possible by preparing me and arming me with the tools I needed to fight the good fight grey rock style. And I also see the world waking up to the tactics of these soulless monsters and fighting back. Its all really good stuff! So basically this email is just a giant thank you! THANK YOU A MILLION TIMES FOR ALL YOU DO! Now...off to read your book 🙂